Friday, July 24, 2015

Nursing Funnies......


when the patient can lift their hips so I can just switch out their incontinence pad by myself
 When the patient can lift their hips so I can just switch out their incontinence pad all by myself

when the charge nurse asks who wants to take the next admission
When the charge nurse asks who wants to take the next admission

when I just transferred one patient and am told I'm getting the next admission and their on the phone with report
One has to pee. One is demanding pain meds, now. One is hypertensive. One is deteriorating. One just crapped everywhere. A doctor is rounding. A family is calling. A transporter is waiting. And pharmacy is on the phone.

when the doctor backs me up to a patient who refuses to listen to me
When the doctor backs me up to a patient who refuses to listen to me

when we're elbow-deep in a code brown, run out of wipes, and I have to hold them up while someone runs to get more
When we’re elbow-deep in a code brown, run out of wipes, and I have to hold the patient up while someone runs to get more

when I say goodbye at the end of the shift to my patient that loved me
When I say goodbye at the end of the shift to my patient who loved me

after I give report on my train wreck patient
After I give report to the floor on my complicated, mean, and labor-intensive patient

running interference for the male nurse and/or handsome doctor that everyone has a crush on
Running interference for the docs

whenever I can't get the IV pump to just. stop. beeping.
Whenever I can’t get the IV pump to just. stop. beeping!

after I give report
Me after report

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